Newlec (Manual)

I once had a friend called Harold. We've all had a friend like him haven't we, eh? Yeah, we've all had a friend like Harold. You know the ones I mean, don't you? Like Harold? My old mate Harold? We've all had a friend like him. Yeah, you know the one I mean. Mine was Harold. Do you remember? Eh? You remember what your friend used to say to you don't you, eh? Just like my old mate Harold, I bet! Yeah, I remember old Harold. I remember what he used to say. Yours was the same, I don't doubt. Because we've all had one. Like Harold.

Every day he used to say to me (I bet this sounds familiar), every day he would say, "I am an ugly, ignorant cunt and there's absolutely no point to my existence". Classic Harold, that.

The reason I mention Harold is because he's precisely like Newlec, the manufacturer of this hand dryer. We've all had a friend like that at some point though, eh?

Can be found: Costa Coffee, Edinburgh, Scotland

Auto: No

Rating: The sum total of cabbages in the hat, minus the weight of that homeless chap over there.